little four eyes

This question comes from a comment from Ingrid.  Have you gone for a second opinion?  How do you reconcile when you get two conflicting opinions from two doctors? – Ann Z

Just on a different topic. I would love to hear peoples opinions on getting a second opinion! I explained this to Paris’s optometrist and he said “well I probably wouldn’t have done that, Dr Smith would not appreciate it I am sure!” I was quite taken aback as I am sure a lot of concedrned parents do the same! What do you think?

There have been quite a few questions in the comments recently asking about what frames people have for their children and whether they like them – and possibly more importantly, if their children like them.

So, comment away.  What frames have you owned for your kid(s) – do you like them – did they last long – did your child seem comfortable?

Learn from my mistake – pay more attention to light.  The other night Elliana came running out of our bathroom and into our lowly lit bedroom.  She smacked right into the corner of our bed and bruised her arm.  I felt SOOOOO bad.  The bed has always been there and is big and wood colored.  Looking back, the change from a bright bathroom light to a low light must have caused her to not see anything momentarily.  

When we met with the vision home-therapist, she recommended keeping lights at night in all the rooms at the same brightness so that Elly’s eyes would not have to keep adjusting and as a result be safer and not cause as much strain on her eyes.  I really need to do a better job at this.  Growing up, I was taught if you leave a room, shut the light off.  My brain is on automatic.  I noticed there are some rooms in my house that tend to be darker too.  My goal this week is to not shut the lights off in the areas she plays most often.

You know how in India we have this concept of arranged marriage?? Despite all the modernization of our country we this concept of parents choosing their child’s life partner is still prevalent. A lot of debate has been going on on this. I do not want to get in depth here as it will take forever to understand the concept . A great many feel that a person has the right and freedom to choose whom he wishes to spend the rest of his life with. That in my land is what we call a “love marriage”. You fall in love, and get married to them. It is highly popular with the youngsters. Then there is this “arranged marriage” where the elders choose the bride or the groom. It works very well too in majority of the cases. But obviously there are lot of reasearch to be done based on the education, employment, family background and the list can go on.
I chose my own life partner which was a big deal in our families as we come from a traditional families. But many of my cousins will not have that choice. One of my favourite cousins is ready for marriage and there is a big “looking out for a bride” going on for him.  One such prospective bride had glasses in the picture. She was very pretty and everything looked good. But the elders did not go for it. Reason: glasses. What if their kids get glasses in future??

I lectured them when they asked me for my opinion. I told them my son has glasses at 2. And for no fault of his. Neither of his parents has glasses. Yet he got them. That does not stop anyone from loving him and doting on him. Why should this girl be rejected on that basis then?? I made them understand that the glasses make should not make any difference if they like the girl and infact it made the girl look so much smarter. I was told 2 days ago that the parents are meeting each other to set a date for the wedding. My son with glasses made me and everyone empathize with the girl with glasses. And I was able to make a convincing case for her.  I feel happy now. I cannot wait to dance at the wedding and to meet my future cousin

There’s a lot of great discussions going on in a couple of comment threads, so if you haven’t been following along, you may want to check in (especially in the Photo Gallery and the Nearsighted Kids post).  I have a list of most recent comments on the side bar, and WordPress now lets you ask to be notified by email if there are new comments on a particular post or page – just go to the page in question and check the “notify me” box when you leave a comment.

Given that there’s so much conversation, would anyone like me to look into starting a discussion forum?  Or is this blog format working alright for keeping up to date and asking questions?  No matter what we choose, the blog won’t go away, but if enough of you want a discussion forum, I’ll look into some options.

And finally, I’ve gotten a number of requests to pass along email addresses to other readers.  I am happy to be able to do this, and will continue to do so.  Just shoot me an email (ann @ shinypebble . com) and I’ll forward your address to whomever you want to contact.

On that note, I do have a group in facebook for Little Four Eyes.  I don’t think it’s all that great for discussion forums, but if you’re on facebook already, this can be a great way of meeting and connecting with other readers and commenters, not to mention sharing pictures.  Please join us!

There has been some discussion in the comments about the types of temples on glasses.  I believe that cable – or comfort cable – temples are the ones the hook all the way around the ear, while skull temples (which sounds like the home of the villain in a fantasy novel) are the temples that just bend over the top of the ear.

You can choose more than one answer on the poll, just in case you have multiple frames with different temples.

The question also came up as to the age of kids with cable temples.  If you have a kid with cable temples on their glasses, what age are they?

We have only had our Hush Puppies frames with cable temples 3 months and already the cable plastic has ripped and is coming apart.  If you read my post about getting the glass – you know I am already not the happiest with Lange Eye Care.  Since then, I have found an amazing one.  Because we purchased the frames at Lange, however, we have to go there for adjustments and repairs.  We also purchased the extended warranty, so I am stuck dealing with them for the next year or so.

10 days ago, we went in to order new cable temples because her’s are ripped and pealing off the temple. I notice her ear is pink where it rubs and want to take care of it before it gets worse.   They asked my color preference (ha ha ha, like they actually listen)  I said, pink, purple, brown, black, blue, anything that fits.  I was told it wouldn’t be a problem as the cables normally last longer.  Since it has been over a week, I called to check on their progress.  News- NOTHING.  They didn’t even order them because they couldn’t find pink.  ARGH. Thank goodness Ell’s glasses are still wearable –an active 2 year old with limited vision and no depth perception, without glasses is a recipe for another emergency room visit.

In my nicest voice, I asked them “Why didn’t you call me?”  Based on their mumbled response – They either forgot, misplaced, or didn’t care.  So, I asked “What do I need to do to make sure my daughter gets her glasses repaired in a timely manner?”  Thinking to myself – Do I need to order the parts and change them myself?  Their advice; If you don’t hear back from us in 6-8 business days, call back.  Let’s see if the parts are ordered this time.

I’m also concerned about the amount of scratches on the lenses.  We are very careful, but Elly has a tendency to throw them when angry.  Shouldn’t they be lasting longer????  And at what time do I make use of my 2 full replacements covered in our extended warranty?

Last night’s daycare pick up was a major battle.  Zoe wanted to put her coat on herself, but couldn’t quite get it right and so was frustrated, and angry, and didn’t want help, and basically, was being a typical 2 year old.  Being in Minnesota, going outside without a coat was not an option, so I ended up trying to get an extremely upset (but bundled) child into her carseat.  She was really worked up, so I took her glasses off pre-emptively so she wouldn’t get angry and pull them off or throw them or break them.

“Glasses!  Glasses!  No glasses off!  No mommy!  Glasses on!” She sobbed harder.

She hasn’t taken off her glasses in anger in months now, so I don’t know why I was worried.  I think I was just flustered, and honestly embarrassed at having to deal with her tantrum in front of other parents and her daycare teachers.  I shouldn’t have taken her glasses off, though.  What a horrible thing to do, to just snatch away something that aids her vision without her permission.  Of course she got upset.  I apologized, and lied, and told her I was just wiping them off since they got wet from crying.  I felt like I needed to give her some justification for taking her glasses.  I’m still learning this parenting thing.

So new rule:  No taking glasses off without asking first.  And Zoe has to follow the rule, too. I don’t want her taking my glasses off.  If we ran into another child with glasses, I wouldn’t want her to take that child’s glasses off.  But mostly, I want her to stick up for herself and tell other people that it’s not ok to just take her glasses away.  So I will ask now, before taking her glasses off, or at least warn her that I’m taking them before just snatching them away.

I’ve never seen glasses do this before, but one of the coatings is peeling off of Sam’s glasses.  It is really bad right in the middle of the left lense, so we are going to replace that one.  He has an appointment coming up with his eye dr in just 2 1/2 months, and odds are his prescription is going to change so we decided not to replace both lenses even though they both need replacing.  The left one is really bad, though.

Anyone else ever had a lense to do this? Here’s a picture, although I don’t know how much you can see.

Things have been going pretty well with the patch. The first two days she did not want anything to do with it, and even hit me. Then the third day she didn’t try at all to take it off, I was very surprised. I thought it was going to be a continuous battle. As long as she is kept busy she doesn’t mind at all. I set her on my lap and we read or stack things and she remains focused. The other day after I took the patch off, she held her hand infront of her eye, I think she wanted to cover it so that her left eye would straighten out. Her eye is straight when the patch is on, though I haven’t seen much improvement once it is removed. We only leave it on for an hour a day. I hope that is long enough. I wonder what dictates the different lengths of time.
As for suggestions on keeping the patch on:
Once I put it on and put her glasses on I clap and say “yaaaay” ..she smiles and claps then. I also just try to play with something that will hold her attention.. like light up toys with buttons, books, and stacking (or knocking over) things. If she gets bored, that seems to be when the glasses come off and she starts pulling at the patch.